OH! PLEASE STOP IT!

I don’t know about you but I’m really tired of receiving those cr4ppy emoti-quote-pics telling me to just be myself and not to care what people think.

“Be you, be true to who you are and walk your path and those who love you will understand and those who don’t are not for your path …
Give no mind to others and if they love you and if they really care they will love you exactly the way you are”…

Blah blah blah! Really!

Well, what if you are a B with an itch and you have no social graces? What if you are a negative know-it-all who doesn’t brush his teeth? What if you’re just plain lazy? (You never do your job or anything you say you’ll do and you always blame others) Or, what if you are lazy and stupid! You know the type; they always have an opinion about things but don’t have the slightest clue what they’re actually talking about. The type of person who gets elected to run a country or manage a service division of a multinational?

Maybe you’re the person who is a trifecta? Stupid, lazy and just plain mean. How the hell are people going to like you if you’re a trifecta? Maybe you should take a hard look at yourself and ask, “Why don’t people like me and what can I do to change their perceptions?”

News Flash! No person is an island and we all need each other unless you’re living on a deserted island. So it follows that people’s opinions matter. Get that? People are always saying don’t stress, don’t worry, so I say – worry and stress all the time, your business and relationships depend upon it. Your boss and your customers are watching and believe me their opinion matters.

Worry about your skills and efficiency because someone else wants your job. Worry about pricing, delivery and standards because your competition is eating your lunch and customers are promiscuous. Worry and stress about your appearance and your health because there are hundreds of viruses and bugs, germs and carcinogens that will make your heart stop and your life pretty uncomfortable unless you shape-up. Worry and stress about your marriageand relationships because love is an action. Love is an active awareness exercise that if worked on could stand the test of time.

You see if you stress and worry, if you work hard, play hard and give your all, if you’re a nice decent person who always tries his best then it is easy for people to like you.

Will they always like you? Hell no! Who likes a person who is always nice, does what she says she’ll do, keeps her word, works harder than everyone, exercises more, and looks better than most? People’s insecurities, issues and jealousy will make them hate you. So in a way you are damned if you do, and you are damned if you don’t. Or are you?

Wake up every day and just try to be a better version of you. Do your best, work hard, and give more so that you are proud of your efforts. Not because you want someone else to say so, or to be proud of you, do it because you’re competing with yourself. Trying to be a better you. When you like and respect yourself it is easier for others to like and respect you. There is no guarantee that they will but its better, I suppose, to earn the sometimes respect of others who appreciate class, than to have the scorn of people for your dysfunction.

In short, people have issues and so do you. People will always projected their cr4p on to you. But in many cases people are a reflection for you to improve yourself. They are a 4D full colour feedback system. The secret I suppose is being able to identify the difference between someone who is projecting their limitations and jealousy and someone who is genuinely showing you that your conduct needs altering. Either way start with you, work on you, and in the end you may get to a point where what they think of you really doesn’t matter because you know who you have become.Who you are. It really won’t matter because you know that you’ve worked on yourself enough to know your intention and conduct came from love and compassion.

Make 2015 yet another step in learning to like, love and respect yourself.

The oxymoron life law – to worry what other people think and yet not to stress! To stress about your results and performance but to remain calm in knowing that no matter what you do, someone will find fault. To improve you so others will notice and respond yet not to be caught up in the opinions of others. To play the game of image, brand and hype knowing it is merely a game you are playing. To play the game but to know it is not real and you are not the game.

After all of that – my head hurts! Have a fantastic self-improving year.